Sunday, February 07, 2010

The Pastor Who Married Us Was Wrong

The pastor who married us was wrong. Based on long years of counselling and on a battery of premarital quizzes, he openly worried that we were too different... too "incompatible."

After a candlelit dinner at home last night to celebrate our two decades of marriage, I gave Ron one of those attractive, designed-for-a-man Hallmark cards.

The trendy blue card looked oddly stark, though, and short on heartfelt sentiment, so I covered the inside with a list of things I love about him.

Things he does. Things I admire. Things we do and are together. Things he does for me and for our family. Small things. Big things. Thoughtful things.

My list brought rare tears to Ron's eyes.

Likewise, he selected a pretty, poetic card for me that he signed "You are my everything."

Sure, we've had our disagreements. Moments of angry frustration. Times when either or both felt disappointed or smothered or bewildered. But we never doubted that we belonged together.

Meeting with us in his small church office, the weary, middle-aged pastor reported results of our premarital tests with a deep sigh, "Well, I have good news and bad news...

"The bad news is that you two are very, very different. The good news is that you know it. And you're fine with it."

Indeed, we do know it. And we're fine with it. Just fine.

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